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NatsumeEdit

Natsume, you are cute.


Simply put; you're uber-kawaii. A real gem on the crown of society. Even if all the synonyms of "attractive" were condensed into a singularity, then manifested into the form of a physical body it would still do little to mirror the magnitude of beauty found in that symetrical marvel you call a face. Literally no one in the history of mankind has produced better looking offspring than your parents did. If you ever got caught jay walking the cop would probably let you go with a warning, your face is that fucking incredible. You are a saint among saints, a silk handkerchief among nappkins, an angel in the snow. You give people with perfect vision something to be thankful for.


I'm happy to be the bearer of good news, but when someones beauty is as many standard deviations away from the mean as yours is everyone listens to your opinion. Just looking through your pictures I can already feel the joy rising in my heart. They say a picture tells a thousand words and on first glance perfect, flawless, wonderful, beautiful woman spring to mind. Of course these are just vague descriptions of what one can only imagine to be the product of generations of impeccable DNA combined with a caring and warm family dynamic. Luckily for you though the impact of your facial beauty is only made better by your charming personality, which along with the above veritably lands you on the highest echelon of dating standards.

Alternate Original Copypasta Version (Warning: Rude content. Parental guidance is suggested.)Edit

Natsume, you are not cute.

Simply put you are ugly as fuck. A real zit on the gooch of society. Even if all the synonyms of "unnatractive" were condensed into a singlularity, then manifested into the form of a physical body it would still do little to mirror the magnitude of grotesqueness found in that asymetrical globule you call a face. There are crack addicted, pill-popping vagrants who've impregnated their sister, then performed improvised lamaze classes with her in radioactive wastelands outside of Chernobyl that have produced better looking offspring than your parents did. If you ever got caught jay walking the cop would still make you do a sobriety test, your face is that fucking mong. You are a pariah among cretins, a cum rag among nappkins, a turd in the snow. You give people with cataracts something to be thankful for.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but when someones ugliness is as many standard deviations away from the mean as yours is you're not allowed to have an opinion. Just looking through your pictures I can already feel the bile creeping up my throat. They say a picture tells a thousand words and on first glance abominable, unkempt, cadaverous, fecal lizard spring to mind. Of course these are just vague descriptions of what one can only imagine to be the product of generations of flagrant alcoholism combined with incest. Sadly for you though the impact of your facial aberrations is aggrandized by your fermented fap rag of a personality, which along with the above veritably lands you on the lowest echelon of dating standards.

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